In the past couple of months I have found myself in unfamiliar territories, I have a new love for writing. I have always had the most eccentric imagination but portraying my visions into text was always so difficult for me. My spelling has always been shocking, my grammar can be appalling as I literally write exactly how I speak and don't even get me started on my punctuation!
When I was in school, I remember receiving assignments from my teachers with bright red pen all over, what I thought, was a darn good essay. Nope, my grammar and punctuation was always incorrect and stopped me from getting that A+. Over the course of the years I have always been terrified to write in fear of making a mistake and feeling embarrassed. When previous managers asked me to write for them I would literally cringe, have about ten panic attacks and it would literally take me hours to write one paragraph. It made it even more stressful as some of my managers loved writing and loved words so much that they would actually make me feel like a fool for not having the same strengths as them. This wasn't on purpose of course but due to this my confidence with writing hit rock bottom. I became the more factual writer.
A few months ago I decided to write my very first blog post. I am not even going to tell you how many times I read it before publishing it. I was terrified that there would be a million mistakes and I wouldn't get my point across as easily as I had hoped. Over the course of time I started writing little stories for fun. I started writing about my intuition and all of the spooky/ fun things that were happening to me. I then created a little night-time habit. Whilst my boyfriend and I were getting ready for bed I would read to him the little stories that I had written that day. His funny comments such as "I can literally feel your personality shine through that one" or "ah your little 'Rev Run' moment is back", by him just laughing at my story and by him engaging and asking me questions about what I had written, unknown to him boosted my confidence immensely.
Over the past few months I have continued to write my blogs, I write a lot for my consultancy clients and I am now writing my very first book, YAY! I have went from taking hours to write one little paragraph afraid of my life of writing to now spending most of my time writing and developing concepts, treatment descriptions, blogs, content for my book etc.
My point is that once I let go of the grip that fear had on me, I found a new love. I found something that I absolutely adore doing. My creative energy has ignited more than I thought it could. Of course, I want to improve my spelling, grammar etc but if I make a mistake its OK, it's not a big deal and I will learn from my mistakes.
I would like you now to close your eyes, take 7 long and deep breaths. I would like you to think about your creative energy and what you can do to enhance it. This could be through dance, singing, painting, writing, playing music, being an activist ...whatever you desire. What do you love doing? Does anything stop you from doing what you love? Listen to those feelings, those doubts, acknowledge them, understand why they are there and where they came from, once you have done this, discard them. These feelings are little messages that are coming to 'protect' you, don't let that protection be a barrier. Listen to them, learn from them and prove them wrong!
When you lose the bond and the grip that fear has on you, you will be free to do what you love...